The eleventh question for the Q&A section is: “In what way are you least understood?”
Oh, man. There are a lot of things people seem to misunderstand about me, though I’m not entirely sure why, because I don’t try to be confusing…but I think the one that irks me the most is that everyone seems to think I’m a negative person. I get it; I take interest in debates and topics that inspire passion in me, and some people mistake that passion for anger, when really I’m just talking, not getting angry…or if I actually do get angry, it tends to be expressed in a sarcastic way to make it less intense. I also try to have a more ‘realistic’ view of things than most people do, because while I believe that hope is important, I also believe it’s important to be prepared for any eventuality.
It’s funny, I can’t think of a way to make that not seem negative, but it’s really not meant to be. I think the Earth is beautiful, I think people are amazing, and when they choose to do good things, they can really make the world a wonderful, hopeful place to be…and I find it fascinating to see them explore their passions, and learn what is worth living – and dying – for. It’s just absolutely fascinating.
At the same time, though, I’m aware of the ways our society has changed over time, I’m certainly aware that you can’t trust everyone and that not everyone has your best interests at heart, and I’m also very aware that things do not, in general, work out in ways that are ‘fair’ a lot of the time. Because of that, I don’t allow myself to get too excited about things that I’m not sure will turn out well, because I prefer to stay grounded…but people always see that as negative.
Look, I’m not saying things are going to turn out horribly, I’m just saying that I’m not going to allow myself to believe that every little thing is going to turn out perfectly, just because I want it to. I’ll hope it does, and I’ll do what I can to make that possible, and I won’t be expecting the worst, I’ll just make sure I’m prepared for it. And I try to make sure others are, as well.
I just wish, sometimes, that people could get into my head and see how positively I view the world, how much promise I think it holds, and how I can’t actually envision a bad future for myself, because I have absolutely no way of envisioning anything at all beyond my son, because nothing else is certain (and I suppose even he is not, but I don’t feel like he’s going to disappear anytime soon). I don’t spend time sitting here thinking about how bad everything is; I think about how beautiful things are, how I can help make things better, how I can make someone smile today, and what I can do that will make the world better…I just don’t waste time thinking about things I can’t do, if I know I can’t do them. Wishing for things I know are outside of reality just seems ridiculous to me.
Only one person in the world has ever thought of me as a positive person, and only one other has admitted that they can see that I don’t view things negatively, but they know why others view it that way. As I said, I do understand why people think I’m being negative, but it’s a misunderstanding, and I wish they could see that. I wish they could see the world through my eyes, and see that I’m not trying to be negative, I’m just trying to make sure everyone is safe and happy, and constantly setting yourself up for disappointment does not lead to good things in the end. Focus on what you have that’s good, work towards the things you want, but be reasonable about it; if you know you can’t achieve it, don’t place all your hope and happiness into it. Too many people do that and end up in deep depression when it doesn’t go ‘as planned’. Work with what you have. Make that into something beautiful, and it will grow from there.
I don’t ever want to restrict anyone, I only want to help. But I can only help if your dreams are realistically attainable. I know that sometimes ‘miracles’ happen, and that’s absolutely wonderful, and I love to see that – but too many people plan on miraculous things happening, or do nothing in hopes that everything will just come to/work out for them eventually. It doesn’t work that way.
…I think I failed at making this seem even slightly positive. Maybe I’m not misunderstood in that respect after all 😄
Check out Mike’s answer at http://emptystress.wordpress.com, and please feel free to post your own in the comments!
(Next question: “Who is the person you miss most right now?”)